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Day 1

I used today to prep and plan for tomorrow. I know a lot of times day 1 is the day that you start your journey but I've had too many day 1's where I feel like I didn't prepare well enough for my journey and then I use that as my excuse to fail. So I'm using my day 1 this time to be my prep day. I ordered the groceries, I planned the exercise, I had a glass of wine. And now it begins...

Honesty time...

I weigh about 245 pounds and am 5 feet 7 inches tall. That means that my BMI is in the obese category. My goal is to lose 80 pounds over the next 40 weeks because the experts tell you that losing 2 pounds per week is ambitious and healthy so that's what I'm going for. That means that by July 8, 2024 I should weigh 165.

My health journey:

I was always athletic but never slim as a child. I played softball and basketball in high school. When I went to join the military for college, I didn't pass the height/weight requirements so I had to get a body fat percentage test which I did pass. So although I was never on the small side, I was also never really considered fat either.

When I was in college I tried out anorexia and bulimia for a brief period. Not eating worked well for me. I lost weight. I felt good. But I was also angry and hungry. Bulimia didn't work for me because it took a lot of work and I wasn't willing to put that in.

I felt like a failure because I didn't look like the other girls in my college who were very much in shape and trim.

After college I joined the military and we had physical training most mornings at the crack of dawn which kept me in shape. However, I also had twins during this time and struggled to get back to my pre-baby shape after they were born. I remember I weighted just at 200 pounds the day they were born because I put on about 50 pounds.

After I left the military I would never have been called slim or thin but I wasn't obese either. I wore a size 10-12 and felt good with that although I always had this voice telling me I should be a size 8.

Then I had two more kids, gaining the appropriate amount of weight each time but never fully returning to my pre-pregnancy weight after either. My daughter had significant health issues the first few years of life. She spent a lot of time at doctor's appointments and in the hospital and I put on even more weight the first few years of her life.

So here I am. 45 years old and at the highest weight of my life by far. I'm tired and I have no motivation to improve things. I know I deserve more.

Tomorrow I plan to start. I don't want to overwhelm myself by setting so many goals each day that I forget one and throw the towel in so I am just going to do my best to follow this outline:

- drink a shake for breakfast

- drink a shake for lunch

- eat a healthy dinner

- sleep at least 7 hours per night

- drink a gallon of water each day

- stretch for 10 minutes each day

- sweat for 10 minutes each day

- cardio for 30 minutes each day

- no alcohol

I know the first few days will be hard but I also know that I can do it.

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